oldie goldie

1. because i’ll never listen to your music. you like heavy beats, and i like softer tones. you like the heavily synthesized sounds vibrating from below the dance floor, i’ve fallen in love with the sounds people fall asleep to. you’re a dancer, i’m a listener. no matter how hard you dance, the only thing i’ll do is sit back and listen to the constant bump-bump-bump of your chest that your steps follow.

2. because i’m too loud. i’m loud, abrasive, no - noise. i’m noise, and you’re an orchestra, and you’re beautiful and i’m an annoyance and i need to be put on silent because there is no peace when you can hear something buzzing in your ear that you can’t even pin down.

3. because i’ve made playlists about you and you’ve never even written a single word about me. i try my best to get your form, your being, from the way your lips curve into your smile to the way you say things like “hi” and “fuck” and love", told in the form of songs i play on repeat, even though you probably can’t even find an adjective that only half-describes me.

4. because you deserve better than me. when you smile, suddenly, the room is ablaze with starlight. your eyes bleed hope from every angle. anybody would be lucky to be in your arms. and the thing is, you don’t even know that. you’re too caught up with yourself that you never see how fucking beautiful and amazing you are, and holy shit i want to tell you so bad that you are all the significant beauties this universe has to offer compressed into a person.

5. because you don’t even think about me for a split second, when you, love, are the thought that hangs over my shoulder, a nagging regret, a mistake of my own design. you haunt me, and i know i don’t haunt you as much as i wish i did because to me you’re everything i need to be happy and to you i’m just a problem.